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Singles typically don't adopt an either/or approach to dating — either casual sex or a serious relationship.Most of them want to have fun, meet interesting people, feel sexual attraction and, at some point, settle into a serious relationship."For people who want to whine and moan about how online dating isn't working," says psychologist Eli Finkel, "go back in time to 1975.Ask somebody, 'What does it feel like to not have any realistic possibility of meeting somebody that you could potentially go on a date with? Finkel is a psychologist at Northwestern University and a professor at the Kellogg School of Management; he's also the author of "The All-or-Nothing Marriage." Finkel and his colleagues have been studying online dating for years.Which is why Finkel thinks Tinder, Bumble, and similar apps that allow you to find potential dates quickly but don't purport to use any scientific algorithm, are the best option for singles today.Here's Finkel: "These companies don't claim that they're going to give you your soulmate, and they don't claim that you can tell who's compatible with you from a profile.But it couldn't predict how much one specific person liked another specific person — which was kind of the whole point.
But research suggests that most of us are wrong about what we want in a partner — the qualities that appeal to us on paper may not be appealing IRL.Tinder's the biggest thing to shake up online dating since "You Got Mail." It damn near invented the idea of right-swiping for "yes" and has evolved from its original "hookups-only" origin to a more standard dating app.